Divorce is not something that crosses your mind until you are already feeling unhappy with your situation. It can be devastating emotionally as well as stressful in many ways. According to a report by Third Age, there are a few things that you can do to make sure that you fully get over your divorce.
When you think about grieving, you may think of the loss of a loved one. Isn’t that essentially what divorce is? You have lost the person that you thought that you would spend the rest of your life with. For this you have to allow yourself to go through the grieving process completely. You will go through a variety of emotions including sadness, anger and depression. Not only are you grieving the loss of your spouse, but you are also grieving the relationship itself.
Spend some time with friends and family who are there to support you. Many times, in the case of divorce, people tend to withdraw from the outside world, assuming that there is no one out there that understands what they are going through. During and after a divorce, you can seek out a support group for recently divorced people.
Understand and come to terms with the reasons that the relationship didn’t work. This is an integral part of getting over a divorce. Unanswered questions quite often lead to resentment and long lasting grudges. You need to come to terms within yourself so that you can move on. Think about the role that you played in the demise of the relationship. Understand why you chose your ex and use this time for some much needed self discovery. You are in the position to redefine yourself as an individual and not part of a couple.
An empathetic and knowledgeable Illinois divorce attorney can assist you with the legalities of the divorce, making it easier for you to cope emotionally.
When you are going through a divorce, one of the steps is to determine spousal support. Alimony, or spousal support, can be awarded to either spouse. How much will be owed and for how long the spousal support will be paid must be determined.
The court must decide all of this without consideration of any marital misconduct which may have taken place. Factors that are considered by the court to decide upon spousal support include:
- The duration of the marriage
- The standard of living during the marriage
- The needs of each spouse
- The current and future earning capabilities of each spouse
- Any impairment that may affect the earning abilities of the spouse that is seeking maintenance
- Any lack of education, training, career opportunities or employment that the spouse seeking support may have due to that spouse having spent his or her time on domestic duties during the time of the marriage
- The age and emotional and physical conditions of each spouse
- The time that it will take the support-seeking spouse to reach the appropriate amount of training, education or employment necessary, and if that spouse is able to support him or herself with the appropriate employment
- Whether or not being the custodian of the child or children of the marriage affects the spouse seeking maintenance from gaining employment to support him or herself
- Contributions that the maintenance-seeking spouse may have made to the training, career, education or career potential of the other spouse
- The income and property of each spouse
- Valid agreements previously made between the spouses
- Any additional factors that the court decides are valid in the spousal maintenance decision
If you are going through a divorce and are seeking spousal support or your ex is seeking support from you, contact a divorce attorney for assistance today. Attorneys in Lombard, Bloomingdale, Rockford, Joliet and St. Charles, Ill. at the Mevorah Law Firm can help you with your case today.
According to a recent article, former United States representative Joe Walsh has filed papers in attempts to end his duty to pay $2,134 per month in child support.
Tea Party Republican Walsh is currently unemployed. He wants to “modify” his previous child support agreement, so that he will only pay 20 percent of his current salary. Walsh is behind on payments as of now; the payments were determined under a previous court order.
According to a court filing, Walsh “is without sufficient income or assets with which to continue to pay his support obligation.” The filing asks to terminate Walsh’s current child support obligation.
Jack Coladarci, an attorney for Walsh’s ex-wife, stated “this is the first communication we’ve received from the congressman; she had no information prior to receiving this filing the mail that he was going to seek…he did not pay January and he has not paid February support…you still have to keep paying until the judge says you can stop.”
“Joe’s employment has been terminated through no voluntary act of his own and he is without sufficient income or assets with which to continue to pay his support obligation. Due to a substantial change in circumstances, Joe requests that his child support obligation be terminated based on his present income and circumstances,” Walsh’s court filing states.
One of Walsh’s lawyers commented that the word “terminate” was misleading and that the word “modify” would be more precise. The end of Walsh’s filing asks the court to “modify Joe’s child support obligation to a sum equal to 20 percent of his net income until the minor child graduates from high school in 2013.”
According to congressman Walsh, the filing was routine and that he does intend to continue making his child support payments. He insisted he wasn’t a “deadbeat dad” during his failed re-election campaign last year.
If you are having issues with your current child support circumstances, it is in your best interest to contact an experienced Illinois attorney to assist you.
The Huffington Post is reporting that a Brooklyn appellate court has rejected a prenuptial agreement
between a millionaire and his estranged wife. Prenuptial agreements have become increasingly common in recent years, especially based on a 2011 survey by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, which found that prenuptial agreements have increased in frequency by 73 percent over a five-year period. What is not so common, however, is a case in which a prenuptial agreement is overturned by a court or otherwise found to be invalid.
In this particular case, Elizabeth Petrakis refused to sign a prenuptial agreement guaranteeing her
$25,000 for every year of marriage that her millionaire husband presented to her three months before their 1998 wedding. Ms. Petrakis finally signed the agreement a mere four days prior to the wedding, but only after her husband agreed to tear up the agreement after the couple had children together.
Petrakis reportedly never made good on this promise, which the court relied on as evidence that fraud
had occurred, finding that Ms. Petrakis never would have signed the agreement in the first place had her husband not promised her to later dispose of the agreement. Ms. Petrakis’ lawyer estimates that Peter Petrakis is currently worth between $20 and $30 million.
Aside from fraud, other reasons that a court might rule a prenuptial agreement to be invalid is if one person has hidden assets from his or her spouse, if there was coercion involved in the signing of the prenuptial agreement, or if the agreement was entered into very close in time to the wedding date.
Whether this case will significantly affect the law governing prenuptial agreements, especially in other states remains to be seen. Therefore, anyone who is contemplating entering into a prenuptial agreement or considering divorce after signing a prenuptial agreement, however, should always seek legal advice from a qualified Illinois prenuptial agreement lawyer prior to taking any action.
Permanent alimony is permanent, according to U.S. News and World Report, and while some unhappy couples may untie the knot, it’s alimony that keeps them tethered to their “till death do us part” vow. Alimony is the court-ordered payment that a husband or wife must make to his or her now ex-spouse upon divorce. “The purpose of alimony,” according to the FreeDictionary.com, is “to avoid any unfair economic consequences of a divorce, even after property is divided and child support, if any, is awarded.” Alimony, when deemed permanent, according to U.S. News and World Report, is squashed only when the payee remarries, which means that oftentimes the payee will opt for a new long-term live-in commitment rather than a marriage. This can often lead to murky waters—it may hardly seem fair that a person need to continue paying alimony to an ex now in a stable relationship with someone else.
“Even opponents of permanent alimony agree that there are sometimes good reasons for a spouse to receive permanent alimony,” such as a disability that prevents him or her from working, according to U.S. News and World Report. Yet permanent alimony can seem like a punishment for marrying the wrong person.
Because of this, many states, including Illinois, have now abandoned giving a permanent alimony ruling, unless arranged for by the couple. Illinois actually calls alimony “maintenance,” and divorce law in Illinois recognizes four forms of alimony: permanent, periodic (or temporary), and rehabilitative (until the ex is deemed self-supporting), and reviewable (in which the court re-evaluates the maintenance ruling at a later date). According to the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, courts in Illinois determine whether or not maintenance is important by considering the length of the marriage, the disparity of earnings, whether one spouse has given up career opportunities for the marriage, the age, health, and abilities of both parties, among other things.
If you or someone you know is considering divorce, alimony is just one of the complicated processes to navigate. Don’t go through it alone. Contact a dedicated Illinois divorce attorney today.
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Divorce is hard for everyone, especially children. Divorce not only affects their life at home but their life at school. A study at Ohio State University found that when a marriage dissolves, a child’s self-esteem and academic performance could be affected, even before the divorce initiates. Usually, a child’s self-esteem will get better over time, but academic performance can continue to decline. The study says that the reason for poor performance is that, “if a child doesn’t learn the skills she needs, it’s hard to catch up to the next grade.” Academic performance is different from a child’s self-esteem because their emotion can bounce back.
A recent Parenting.com article gave advice on how to ensure that your child’s grades don’t slip. The first advice is to give them lots of personal attention. This will show your child that you love them and will give them a break from the stresses of life. Next, the parent should be knowledgeable about how their child feels about school. Parents should set aside time everyday to talk to their child about their day at school or even offer help with an assignment. There is, also, the option of getting a counselor for you and your child. Having a counselor can make it easier to discuss any problems that are going on. A parent should be informed about what is going on at the school. It can be helpful to attend any school events, especially parent-teacher conferences. Lastly, the website recommends hiring a tutor. A tutor can help get your child up to speed with the rest of their grades’ academic skills.
Divorce can be hard for anyone in the family, not just the children. If you or someone you know is going through a divorce, be sure to contact an experienced divorce lawyer. Contact an Illinois Divorce Attorney today.
Kim Kardashian’s marriage to NBA player Kris Humphries made headlines—especially when, after just 72 days of marriage, Kardashian filed for divorce. She is hoping to be divorced before July, when her baby with Kanye West is due.
A judge has now decided May 6 will be the start of the trial, which he believes allows Humphries’ lawyer adequate time to prepare a case. However, Humphries is claiming that the marriage was nothing more than a publicity stunt for her show, “Keeping Up With the Kardashians,” and wants the marriage annulled instead. Since Kardashian is denying this claim, Humphries attorney also asked if the trial date could be postponed until after basketball season. The judge declined, stating that even firefighters and police officers have to take time off when dealing with divorce cases.
His attorney, Marshall Waller, was not pleased. “This is a fraud case,” Waller told the court. “It really is. And that is a case that takes a lot of time to develop. We are not ready to go forward. We do need more time.”
According to Entertainment Weekly, who also covered the extravagant marriage ceremony, the trial is expected to last five days, with multiple witnesses testifying on behalf of both Kardashian and Humphries.
The judge also commented that he has tentatively decided to deny Waller’s motion to bifurcate the case—allowing Kardashian to be legally divorced, even if the financial problems are not sorted out. The next court date scheduled is April 12 for a mandatory settlement case, and both Kardashian and Humphries are required to attend. Settlement discussions have taken place, but so far nothing has been decided.
Kardashian’s lawyer continues to push for an expedited trial, stating that Humphries held Kardashian “hostage” needlessly and this has been dragging out for too long.
If the trial goes through, this will be Kardashian’s second divorce.
If you’re dealing with a difficult divorce, a skilled lawyer can help successfully argue your case. Our attorneys, working out of multiple offices in DuPage County, are available and willing to walk you through the next steps. Contact us today to learn more.
Image courtesy of celebuzz.com
The creator of the Skinnygirl margaritas, Bethenny Frankel, has announced she is divorcing her husband of three years, Jason Hoppy, a pharmaceutical sales rep. Fans also watched the couple’s romance and marriage play out on Frankel’s reality television shows featured on Bravo, “Bethenny Getting Married?” “Bethenny Ever After” and “Bethenny.”
According to a report in the Huffington Post, the two are still living together and will share custody of their two year-old daughter.
In a May 2012 interview with People magazine, Frankel discussed the struggles she faced in her marriage. “Money, family, gender roles, we just keep fighting over them,” she told the magazine. “It’s almost like a scab that you keep picking at.”
Frankel met Hoppy at a nightclub in November 2008, and they two became engaged 11 months later.
Many are predicting that Frankel’s fortune will be a major issue in divorce proceedings. She hit Forbes Magazine Celebrity 100 list last year. And Business Insider reports she sold her Skinnygirl product line to Jim Beam in March 2011 for a reported $120 million. Later SEC filings proved the acquisition of just the brand name was $8 million. There are reports that Hoppy did sign a pre-nuptial agreement before the couple was married.
If you are having marital problems and are considering a divorce, you should consult with an experienced Illinois divorce attorney to find out what you are entitled to. Make sure your assets and child custody rights are protected in what can be a very stressful and emotional process.
A UK newspaper reported a story about surprisingly intense reactions to grandparents keeping in contact with their grandchildren after a divorce. Even though this story is not domestic news, issues regarding divorce in first world countries remain more or less the same.
According to the Telegraph, police in the UK are being called to investigate cases where grandparents are approaching their grandchildren with postcards or presents as harassment. Grandparents often find themselves cut off by the parent who has the custody of a child, but it looks like things are getting worse. In some cases the elderly have been forced to hand over DNA samples or fingerprints, and some have even been threatened with arrest or called to a police station after sending a card or a present to their grandchildren. Some of the grandparents feel they have been humiliated for having to talk to officers regarding something like this.
If the custodial parent unreasonably denies visitation for a grandparent or a sibling, it is possible to petition for visitation. There are criteria for the petition, out of which one must be met. Examples of these criteria are: the parent that is related to the grandparent is mentally incompetent, dead or incarcerated; the parent related to the grandparent has lost parental rights by judicial act; the child is illegitimate and the parents are not living together. These are only a few of the criteria for such petition. For more information, contact an experienced divorce attorney.
Divorces are always emotional and stressful, but not all sides are always considered. Do not call the police on your child’s grandparents for sending a postcard. Take care of such matters during the divorce process with help from qualified attorneys. To make the process less painful, contact a knowledgeable divorce attorney in Illinois.
It’s not easy to determine just how many Americans are being unfaithful in a marriage, primarily due to the necessary secrecy that an affair requires. Yet according to menstuff.org, an impressive 22 percent of married men “have strayed at least once during their married lives,” compared with 14 percent of women. Younger people are more likely to cheat, and younger married women more likely to cheat than young married men. The vast majority of partners did not know about the cheating—which is why, most likely, many relationships in which either one or both partners were cheating ended in divorce. According to the Associated Press and reported by menstuff.org, 17 percent of divorces in the U.S. are caused by infidelity.
And yet what does cheating, or infidelity, really mean? Does looking at another person and desiring him or her count as cheating? Do moves actually have to be made? University of Michigan Research Assistant Professor Daniel Kruger set out to determine just that, and earlier this year published a cheating survey, in which he looked at how people define infidelity, according to the Huffington Post. Just over 450 college students were surveyed, and were asked to “look at 27 different behaviors and assign them a number on a scale of 0 to 100 based on the extent to which they believed the action would be considered cheating in a long-term relationship,” according to the Huffington Post.
The survey found that women rated ten items higher than did men, “and men’s ratings were higher on a minor financial support item.” The survey also found, rather predictably, that women considered emotional interaction with a person of the opposite sex cheating more often than men did—men, for the most part, only considered sexual interaction as being unfaithful.
If you are considering divorce because your spouse has been unfaithful—no matter what that means to you—don’t go through it alone. Contact a dedicated Chicago-area divorce attorney today.
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